DARKNESS UNVEILED - Lightsaber Duel - LCC 2018 (11/1/18)



  • @tddavis I have thought of that before, if someone has an very similar to mine, I will post mine right away, that way they do not think I copied them, (if I post it right away) there is no way I can get my video done that fast, at the quality to be similar to there's (Hope I make sense)

    And another thing, I guess is the value of production of my video,(and I am not trying to brag, there are some others who are really good!) I do not want someone to see the quality of my video then try to make something with better quality.

    And I do not know if Production Crate even cares.

    But I guess that is just me, I like to be safe, but I do see what you are saying, Thanks for your advice :)

  • @Triem23 @tddavis So I did not add any music, with all the sounds, what do you guys think? Should I add music, or not?


  • @HIS_Films  You know I did not even notice the absence.  It certainly isn't hurt by the lack of music IMHO.  And to your earlier post about my concern; good deal.  At least you have a plan in place. 

  • @tddavis I figured that might of happened, where you didn't even notice, which is a good thing, so I think I might just leave it, thanks ;)

  • Doesn't need music. The SFX carry it. 

  • That's a sweet piece!  Nothing's jumping out for improvements. As others have said, this is easily one of your best.  Well done!

  • "I do not want someone to see the quality of my video then try to make something with better quality."

    Please don't take this the wrong way, but that kind of "hoarding" attitude is what kills community. It sounds like winning the prize is more important than producing quality work. Is that really where your heart is at in doing this stuff?  To have your work inspire someone else to push that much harder would be awesome IMO. Raise the bar!

  • @HIS_Films I'm with jsbarrett on this one... much as I enjoy winning prizes, the whole point of having competitions is to challenge each other to create your best work...

    And anyway, being the winner in a field of strong entries is a lot more satisfying than being the winner when everyone else's work is bad and yours is definitely a strong entry

  • @jsbarrett ; @JMcAllister ;  Sorry, I guess I have been that way lately since I have not won one in a very long time, but I know you guys are totally right :) And thank you guys for your honesty! I am glad you all liked it! I guess I will post it later today once I get back from shearing Christmas Trees!

    @Triem23 Alright, I will leave it! Their is plenty of sfx.

  • edited September 2017

    It's all good, as usual. :) But, because you're that good, I still have notes.

    Only thing that really occured to me was: all the action is taking place in the centre of the screen.  You could put a large black box around the outside and miss nothing.  I know you want to keep people looking on one place in a fast-paced short clip, but you could still 'decorate' around that.

    Also all the Kapow splats etc. are of a similar size.  Don't know what the 'convention' is for using them, but could you scale/shrink some and spread them around a bit more? Especially when against the black section.

    The fruit is quite small and only two (lemons? potatoes)? Could you roto it and scale it up, or duplicate it so it looked like there were two or three on the same path all being cut at the same time and maybe colour some of the duplicates to be red , green etc. for variety? Or just paste on some other fruit that you threw against a green screen or something?

    The sword swooshes seem quite small. Could they have some glow, or be made bigger to make the path of the sword look larger? In the white out section, could the actor travel across the screen a little rather than just be in the middle? All those sort of actions in games have the character flying off for miles when hit to cut to the next frame where he's back where he started, on the ground, so that's "expected".

    Finally, and this would require a reshoot, so forget it, but the actors aren't moving much. The sword swipes aren't very broad and Bruce's punches (punches, not open handed or chops?) are like he's just hitting a single spot and the camera is a bit too static. Could you zoom in slowly during that section as he moves?

    Also, where are his feet? If you have some image behind those black bars, slide it up and lose some space above his head, perhaps?

  • @Palacono I do not understand your first point that you made about the black box

    The second point is a good one, I should have done that, I was going to fix it, but I replaced the editor with the final, above the original :( I do not know why I did that, big mistake on my part, so that means I can not edit anything that you said :( Next time I will make two different timelines for the original, and for the final edit ;)

    The fruit, ( A green apple, and an orange, Orange :D ) The Orange was not originally there, I had rotoscoped it from another take. But making them bigger probably would have been better. And also coloring them brighter would of have been good as well.

    The sword swooshes, should have been more exaggerated! But for the whit scene, For the original, the ninja was more straight,but I animated him, I rotated him some to make it look more punchy! And I also moved him higher. If I did what you said, It would be to fast, rather then the slo-mo I am looking for, I got to do what I got to do in only ten seconds!

    And you are right that the actors aren't moving that much, and I guess that was the style I was kind of looking for since it was Anime, and a person VS.  a person fight. But I know what you are saying ;)

    And the part that shows Bruce, I should have moved him up a bit more, but you do see him kick.

    Thanks Palacono! Glad you liked it for the most part ;)

  • So I am going to post it, thanks guys!

  • good luck in the competition! 

  • edited September 2017

    By a box around the centre, I meant you could have cropped this to be the middle 1/3 of the screen like an upright iPhone clip and you'd still have all the action in it. I know the flying actor had to be slowmo, I just thought there was a little room and time to move him sideways a bit more, but it's only an opinion and everyone's got a different one. :D

    I'm really just picking at details in each section slightly because it's very solid and hangs together very well and all in all is one of your best and yes: I liked it a lot. :)

  • @JMcAllister Thanks! I will get the results on the second of October, and I will post the video here on my thread!

  • @Palacono Thank you for your kind words! But please, keep giving your opinion, I like seeing it from other people's views ;)


  • edited October 2017

    Here is the Announcement of the winner! (Like I promised)


  • Ok! Here is the Trailer for Bologna Man!

    Please let me know what you all think! And please share it with as many people!

    Everything was pretty much done in Hitfilm except all the 3d stuff, which was done in After Effects.

    Here is the Trailer for the first episode of the Bologna Man! The beginning - The story of how Billy Tay became Bologna Man!


  • Oh, and thank you @tddavis for helping me out!

  • @HIS_Films You're certainly welcome but I didn't really do anything.


  • Firstly, well done on getting a nice looking trailer. I think you certainly ran with those elements of that 'Classic tailer look' and applied them here. Being honest with you, I felt it started really strong, nicely cut, timed and look but then in the middle it lost that momentum and felt a bit long, then you seem to pull it back for the finish.

  • edited October 2017

    Altogether it looks great. :) All the right things in the right places, but not all scenes have the same level as polish as others.

    Is this finished or work in progress? There was a lot of black, which I'm assuming/hoping you'll fill in with more scenes. I know trailers do have the odd bit of "listen to the voiceover with no visual distraction" but they're usually fairly short and some of these were pretty long.

    Some green spill around the character in a few places and the lighting on him as he walked to the edge of the roof at 0:35 seemed too bright for the scene. The slowmo on the explosion at 1:40 has sparks that are too perfect and need messing up to look 'real'. Plus it looks like the explosion itself got clipped at the bottom in some way.

    Not sure about the tone. Is it supposed to be as completely serious as the music and some of the scenes imply? In which case the bit at 1:31 (and others) seems out of place. Or it is supposed to be more comedic, with the 'comedy swagger' at 0:33 , the flying into the building at 0:56, the cartoony twirl after the hit at 0:59 and the facial expressions at 1:29, even the way he says "Bologna Man" at 1:18? In which case at 0:13 you could have more text saying "...and hit the snooze button".

    Basically, I wasn't sure which genre it's going for. Is it like a sort of "Kick Ass" style, with "real" villains and a "comically inept" hero or something else?

    There is also the very real possibility that I'm reading too much into this and the scenes that were well done.. were well done, so: keep at it. :)

    My own problem is I always read the name as it spelt and not as "Baloney" or the more correct:"Bolon-ya", but you might also run into that when you've got a multi-million dollar franchise later. ;)

  • @Andy001z Thank you for your honesty! I will keep that in mind for future projects, glad you liked it!

    @Palacono Is this finished or work in progress?  Yes and no, Yes because the trailer is complete, no because the film still needs to be filmed for the most part, so in saying that, I can fix those scenes that need work. And I agree that some of the black is a little long, I was following the "how to make a hollywood trailer" video the jsbarret shared, and in there it what somewhat long on some parts, but maybe I was following that to much ;)

    The explosion was from Andrew kramer, so most of his stuff gets cut off, so I had to trim a little and feather it, I guess I should have done more. And true with the sparks, now I have better sparks, so I will change that up for the film.

    So the tone, it is serious action, mixed with a comedic person, but I won't get to much in detail, I will save that for the film ;)

    Yea, I guess it would be a "Kick Ass" Genre film.

    We have talked about the name as well, because most people will probably read it wrong :( and we were thinking of having it spelled Boloney, as in "Phoney Boloney" but we decide just to keep it bologna, who knows, we might teach people to read it right ;)

    Well thank you for your honesty and comments Palacono! :) Glad you like it! It was the most work I have spent on making anything thus far, never did the 3d camera movements before, so glad it turned out well!


  • Another video at Sweet Providence Farm! At Sweet Providence we don't just do Christmas trees, but also pumpkins! Here is a quick edit of the first day we sold pumpkins!


  • Nice edit!  I like how you tracked the logo onto the parking lot for a couple shots.  Nice touch. The only part that didn't really click for me was from :22 to about :29, when it felt like the focus of the shot was this rather barren-looking part of the property.  Toward the end of that segment I noticed the pattern cut into some bushes low in the frame, and felt like maybe the camera just wasn't targeting that spot correctly.  Then I finally watched it full-screen and noticed the small possibly-pumpkin blobs that are barely visible.  If that's the pumpkin patch, then a better way to spotlight it might have been to use a series of shots: start close, then go wider with one or two of those zoom transitions.  The pumpkins are so small in the wide shot that they're easy to miss.

    On a side note, I gotta say that "Sweet Providence Pumpkins" almost sounds like a G-rated profanity.  "Sweet providence pumpkins, grandma!  Did you drop your teeth into the soup again?" :D

  • @jsbarrett Glad you liked it!

    So 0:22-0:29 were shots mainly targeting the corn maze, not the pumpkins, like you said though, I probably should have had a close up first of the corn maze  then show the areal shot ;)

    Lol about the "G-rated profanity" XD

    p.s. did you watch the Bologna Man trailer?

  • Yeah, I saw the trailer.  Nice work!  Definitely hit the classic action trailer style pretty well.  Most of the things I might've commented on were already mentioned by @Palacono, so I'll largely refrain (I'm coming back after about two weeks of not reading anything, so I'm skimming/skipping a lot). However, I do want to talk a little more about the issue of the long black gaps.

    In your reply to @Palacono, you said that you might've been adhering too literally to what was in the trailer example I shared. I agree.  Black gaps like that do work at times, but you have to pace them carefully, just like you carefully pace the length of your shots.  For the first gap (at about :25), I would've kept that pretty short, introducing a new shot at about the same time that the vocals start in the music bed, possibly with a fade-in (my gut says that would work better than a cut).  Similar thing for the second one at :37.  I'd end the black right after the "destroy us all" line finishes.  You could go back to black briefly during "Someone has to stand against it" if you want, but a 10-second gap is waaay too long.

    In the end, you did a pretty good job at following what you saw as the science/formula of the trailer example, but perhaps misinterpreted some parts.  Keep studying and practicing.  Your work gets better with every piece you make.

  • @jsbarrett Thank you for those tips, on the next episode trailer I will apply what you all said! And thank you for your kind words!

  • @HIS__Films - Bologna Man has some great shots in it but I agree with Palacono about the black out spots. A little too long. Otherwise I liked the rest!

    Holy sweet providence pumpkins, Batman! Love the overhead shots. I think the problem with the pumpkin patch shot is the pumpkins are backlit and we are seeing the shadow side. Otherwise, the whole thing is beautifully done. Kudos!!!

  • @StormyKnight Glad you liked the videos for the most part! Still learning, but that is a good thing! Can't wait to film more stuff with the drone!

This discussion has been closed.